


Worry Stone

by InfiniteEmma



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Dead Jessica, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode: s01e01 Pilot, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Sadness, Worry Stone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-30
Updated: 2015-08-30
Packaged: 2018-04-18 00:46:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4685849
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InfiniteEmma/pseuds/InfiniteEmma
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam s numb after Jess's death- and Dean knows he can't make it better, but at least he can try.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Worry Stone

Sam was silent the entire ride to the motel. The smell of smoke hung heavy in the air and the only movement Sam made after getting into the car was to turn the music on, at a volume that he would have usually have complained about. Dean didn’t comment, just swung into the driver’s seat and pulled out of the parking lot, tires squealing.

They drove east in silence for a couple hours, until Dean’s eyes started to blur and he saw a sign for a motel that didn’t look completely terrible. Sam didn’t move when they pulled in, didn’t move until Dean had returned from getting a room and had opened the trunk to get their bags. He slid from the car, then, and took his duffle from Dean’s hands. 

Once Dean got the motel room unlocked Sam pushed past him and threw his bag at the foot of the bed furthest from the door then sat on the side of the bed, facing away from the door- facing away from Dean.

“You want first shower?” Dean asked, tentatively, walking towards Sam. Sam shook his head once, mutely. “Okay...I’ll be fast. Won’t hog all the hot water.” Won’t leave you alone out here for too long. Dean could tell he was wound tight, holding back a barrage of emotion that he probably wasn’t prepared to deal with right now. Hell, Dean didn’t know how you could ever be prepared to deal with the amount of sheer grief that Sam must be holding back right now.

True to his word, Dean showered fast, emerging from the bathroom in a cloud of steam to be greeted by the sight of his brother sitting in the exact same position, staring at his hands. He looked numb. Looked like he had just been punched in the gut and didn’t know what to do or how to deal with it.

“Sam?” No answer. “Hey, bud, you wanna get a shower now?” There wasn’t any sign Sam had heard him. “Sammy?” 

Sam finally moved, giving a quiet grunt and the smallest shake of his head.

“Okay.” 

Dean ventured closer to Sam and sat next to him on the bed. Dean didn’t think it was his imagination that Sam shifted his arm imperceptibly closer so that the flannel of Dean’s shirt brushed Sam’s. Suddenly an idea came to Dean. He got up and went over to his bag and started digging through it. Sam, who had looked up quickly when Dean had gotten up was back to staring numbly at his clenched hands. Dean found what was looking for and came over back over to Sam, resuming his spot at Sam’s side. He reached over and grabbed Sam’s right hand, forcing it open gently and placing something into it. It was a rock- worn and smooth and blackish grey, almost as long as Sam’s thumb. Sam looked up at Dean sideways through his hair in confusion.

“It’s a- it’s a worry stone,” Dean explained, reddening slightly “you just kinda rub it and- i don’t know, it helps.” 

Sam looked back down at the stone and after a moment of hesitation started rubbing it with his thumb, slowly and gently at first, barely brushing it’s smooth surface. After a couple minutes though he started using more pressure, rubbing it faster and harder, until his thumb was white where it was pressed against the stone. After about fifteen minutes Dean heard him give a small sniff. Dean nudged him slightly and Sam leaned against him- just a tad, barely applying any weight- and Dean knew that his rock hard mask was cracking. 

A single tear fell onto the stone, then another and suddenly Sam was throwing himself into Dean’s arms, sobbing loudly, his arms wrapping tightly around Dean’s neck.

“Shhh- shhh...it’s okay buddy. Let it out.” Dean murmured, rubbing Sam’s back and returning Sam’s tight grasp.

“It’s. Not.” Sam gasped, between sobs. “Jess...Jess’s- hhurrgh”. He didn’t finish his sentence, but instead buried his head deeper into Dean’s neck. Dean didn’t try to reassure him anymore- how could he? The love of his little brother's life had just died- murdered by a remnant of the life Sam had tried to leave. Now he was alone in the world with his high school drop out of a brother and a future that was growing darker by the second. Dean didn’t have any wisecrack that could make that better. All he could do was sit there and hold Sam as his life fell apart in burning pieces around him.

 

\-----

 

It was almost an hour later before Sam had pulled himself together enough to stop crying enough that he could form a sentence. His grip on Dean loosened and he turned his head to the side just enough so his words could be heard.

“I don’t- I don’t know how I’m gonna do it without her.” He said, words punctuated by sniffs and small sobs. “I- I- I just- I loved her. So- so much. I- I just-”. He broke down again, gripping Dean closer, shaking them both with the strength of his grief.

“You’re gonna be fine Sammy. You are. They next couple weeks- I’m not gonna lie, kiddo, they’re gonna be hell. But you’re gonna make it through. I know you are.” 

“Hhur-hurggh”.

“Yeah, I know.”

And Dean knew that this wasn’t the last time that Sam would miss Jess. He knew that this wasn’t the last time that Sam would be gripped with the fear that he couldn’t survive without Jess. And he knew that things wouldn’t be better in the morning, when they would have to make some hard decisions. Decisions about whether Sam was going to go back to Stanford. Decisions about whether they would attend the funeral. But Dean also knew that his brother was strong- stronger than Dean ever was- and Dean knew that if anyone could make it through, Sam could.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this was my first fic and it came from an idea I just had kinda bouncing around my head for a while. It's totally un-beta'd so all mistakes are mine (speaking of which, I'm in search of a beta so hit me up :P). Please drop me a review and keep in mind that I am always in search of prompts!  
> -Emma


End file.
